First update is in regards to Wolfie: Daily is beside himself with grief. I have never seen a cat so depressed and lethargic. The first couple of days, he tried desperately to escape the house. I think he was absolutely certain he would find Wolfie outside somewhere. Then he gave that up and commenced wandering from room to room plaintively calling. Those two cats have been together every day for the past 6 or 7 years. And now Daily is miserably lonely. That makes me very sad.
How is Kira handling it? She doesn't seem to care one way or another. It's like she's the princess and it's all about her. What's one cat more or less? But that may not be fair. She keeps checking on Daily. She licks him on the head and lightly nibbles him with her front teeth. So, maybe I'm not reading her right. Maybe she really does miss Wolfie. It just doesn't show the same way.
Second update is regarding Kira. When we got her a year ago, she had major physical and psychological issues. For the first three months, we had to clean up after her every single day, sometimes twice a day. It was like she didn't know how to use the outdoors for her bathroom needs. Now, she is so meticulous that she uses the same part of the yard every day. And she will come to us and sit in front of us and look us in the eyes when she needs to go outside. She is very smart. When we got her, she weighed 58 pounds, and her lips were white and the lower ones hung down significantly. Now, she weighs 63 pounds...it doesn't seem like a huge weight gain and it certainly isn't (the vet thinks she should weigh about 90 pounds), but there have been other changes. We feed her four cups of food a day, the amount called for to feed a 90 pound dog...she eats it all, but to no avail. She simply has a super fast metabolism (for which I am jealous). However, she is now more muscular, and much stronger, and her lips are back in place and the right color. Her coat is beautiful. She holds her head up and wags her tail often. She is definitely OUR dog now. We have cleared up the nightly barking and whining (actually, I think the cats helped her with that by keeping her company). She comes immediately when called. She gets a lot of exercise, and does not spend all her time racing from front door to back door and barking at everyone who passes. When we are all home together, she goes to her cushion in the living room, and stays there content just to be with us. What a beautiful dog. And probably the gentlest dog I have ever known. The other day, I put my whole hand in her mouth and she just licked me. I would NEVER have dreamed of doing that with Ziggy. If I had, I would not be playing the piano any more. So, Kira has made herself very much a part of our lives. She is amazing.
Third update: my bald eagles. I believe that the bald eagles I saw in the nest near our house at the end of last year moved away and started building a nest south of Alexandria in December or January. The nest has been empty. And now it is probably a little late in the season for any eagles to move into it. Occasionally, I see a big beautiful bald eagle flying overhead, but I am not so sure it is one of the two I saw on the nest at the end of last year. This morning, on the drive in, I looked up at the big nest and thought I saw the outline of an eagle. Yes, traffic was thick, but I could not help but look again, and there she was, perched on the side of the nest, as big and beautiful a bald eagle as she should be. What is it about those birds??? I absolutely love them. I don't know if she was checking the nest out as a possible new aerie...but wouldn't it be NICE???
Fourth update: the continuing saga of "Operation Project Room." It is so much easier to move around that room now. It is actually a pleasant place to spend time, on the computer, playing with beads, painting water colors, looking out the window at all the "city wildlife" (squirrels, birds, chipmunks, occasional hawks and eagles, foxes, and even a couple of times a deer or two!). I like it. Of course, I still have about eight file boxes to go through, but I'm not feeling so stressed about the paperwork now.
And now I find myself reading and playing the piano. Right now, I am reading Robert Louis Stevenson's "Dynamiter" in paper format (not on the pony). I didn't even know he had written such a book. But I am enjoying it, even with the rather dense writing.
I'm also playing the piano again. I had it tuned last week, and now that the house is staying clean (with Sara's care), I feel like playing. I'm still working on the Handel Sarabande and today picked up my copy of the Moonlight Sonata. I'd like to relearn that. Interestingly, the first time I played it, I did a MUCH better job than the next four or five times. That's strange.
Ok, so I'm really rambling. I'll quit now.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Quality of Life
Girl from Texas left a comment on my March 26 entry, saying that there was such a thing as quality of living, and that it was a very important variable in the decision as to when to euthanize a pet.
It made me wonder: What is quality of life for a cat? Except for those rare cats that belong to adventurous people, cats don't go hiking, or to operas, or on vacations to the beach, or out to fancy restaurants. They don't have dinner parties with friends, or read books or go to museums. They don't write blogs, or keep in touch with friends through e-mail, or do creative things like painting and needlepoint and the like.
What is quality of life for a house cat that never goes outside. Wolfie used to sleep on the dog bed, sit in the front window and watch people and dogs go by, then sleep in a little patch of sunlight coming in through the dining room window. Then he would look out the window at birds he cannot chase, and sleep some more. When we got home from work, he was happy to be fed, and then he checked out Kira's bowl to see if she had left him any little tidbits (usually, she did). Then he came to sleep on the sofa near us. We have a little space heater that the cats think of as their own personal little fireplace. Wolfie absolutely loved the "fireplace." If it was not on, he would sit in front of it an look at me, willing me to turn it on for him, so he could curl up on the floor in front of it (his hearth) and ... sleep. But that was it. Sleep, eat, look out the window, be petted, lick Daily, rub against Kira.
I think that quality of life for a house cat must be comfort and love. I have always felt that all of my pets have both comfort and love in spades. They are well cared for and very well loved. But now that he is gone, I have these little doubts...did I love little Wolfie enough? Setting aside religious beliefs, just how much are you supposed to love a pet? I love all my pets, but I am closer to Daily than any of the others. I call him my "familiar." It's like he knows what I am thinking, and he is funny and lively and so affectionate. And yet, I also like to call him the "pain-in-the-butt-cat." I could not imagine going through this with him. Yet, I know someday I will have to. At what point is comfort and love not enough?
I have a dear friend who simply could not say goodbye to a cat that was dying of stomach cancer, and with excellent veterinarian care, she managed to keep that little cat alive for six more months (at a cost of $12,000). She said she just could not stand the thought of not having this little being with her. Now, well removed from the event, she says she wishes she hadn't put the little cat through all that. But in my opinion, it wasn't just the cat that suffered. She put herself through so much grief over those six months, trying to prolong the inevitable. As it is, I feel really bad about how long Wolfie had his asthma. He didn't seem to have any real trouble living with it for 8 years, but lately it started to act up more and more. I think the secondary infection is what caused the collapsed lung. But then again, I am not a vet.
I do miss Wolfie very much. I miss his sweet little face, with the black lips that look like a kiss. I miss his funny little sound like a purr and meow put together... "gwaww." I really miss the way he would sit on the stool in the kitchen and reach out to pat me with his paw. He was so endearing when he sat up on his haunches and reached out with both paws to grab my arm.
I think we second guess ourselves whenever we have to say goodbye to a beloved pet. I regret the loss of Rocky, Toby, Sadie, Ziggy, and now Wolfie. But I cannot regret letting them into my life and my heart. There's nothing like being greeted at the door by those loving little faces after a rough day at the office.
And so, I know I will face the loss again and again, as long as I bring these little beings into my life. Which I will continue to do. Will I get another cat any time soon? I don't think so...at least not right now. Someday, maybe. Not now.
It made me wonder: What is quality of life for a cat? Except for those rare cats that belong to adventurous people, cats don't go hiking, or to operas, or on vacations to the beach, or out to fancy restaurants. They don't have dinner parties with friends, or read books or go to museums. They don't write blogs, or keep in touch with friends through e-mail, or do creative things like painting and needlepoint and the like.
What is quality of life for a house cat that never goes outside. Wolfie used to sleep on the dog bed, sit in the front window and watch people and dogs go by, then sleep in a little patch of sunlight coming in through the dining room window. Then he would look out the window at birds he cannot chase, and sleep some more. When we got home from work, he was happy to be fed, and then he checked out Kira's bowl to see if she had left him any little tidbits (usually, she did). Then he came to sleep on the sofa near us. We have a little space heater that the cats think of as their own personal little fireplace. Wolfie absolutely loved the "fireplace." If it was not on, he would sit in front of it an look at me, willing me to turn it on for him, so he could curl up on the floor in front of it (his hearth) and ... sleep. But that was it. Sleep, eat, look out the window, be petted, lick Daily, rub against Kira.
I think that quality of life for a house cat must be comfort and love. I have always felt that all of my pets have both comfort and love in spades. They are well cared for and very well loved. But now that he is gone, I have these little doubts...did I love little Wolfie enough? Setting aside religious beliefs, just how much are you supposed to love a pet? I love all my pets, but I am closer to Daily than any of the others. I call him my "familiar." It's like he knows what I am thinking, and he is funny and lively and so affectionate. And yet, I also like to call him the "pain-in-the-butt-cat." I could not imagine going through this with him. Yet, I know someday I will have to. At what point is comfort and love not enough?
I have a dear friend who simply could not say goodbye to a cat that was dying of stomach cancer, and with excellent veterinarian care, she managed to keep that little cat alive for six more months (at a cost of $12,000). She said she just could not stand the thought of not having this little being with her. Now, well removed from the event, she says she wishes she hadn't put the little cat through all that. But in my opinion, it wasn't just the cat that suffered. She put herself through so much grief over those six months, trying to prolong the inevitable. As it is, I feel really bad about how long Wolfie had his asthma. He didn't seem to have any real trouble living with it for 8 years, but lately it started to act up more and more. I think the secondary infection is what caused the collapsed lung. But then again, I am not a vet.
I do miss Wolfie very much. I miss his sweet little face, with the black lips that look like a kiss. I miss his funny little sound like a purr and meow put together... "gwaww." I really miss the way he would sit on the stool in the kitchen and reach out to pat me with his paw. He was so endearing when he sat up on his haunches and reached out with both paws to grab my arm.
I think we second guess ourselves whenever we have to say goodbye to a beloved pet. I regret the loss of Rocky, Toby, Sadie, Ziggy, and now Wolfie. But I cannot regret letting them into my life and my heart. There's nothing like being greeted at the door by those loving little faces after a rough day at the office.
And so, I know I will face the loss again and again, as long as I bring these little beings into my life. Which I will continue to do. Will I get another cat any time soon? I don't think so...at least not right now. Someday, maybe. Not now.
Thursday, March 26, 2009
Remind me, please, why we have animals?
I need to be reminded of what they add to our lives…other than pain of loss, which is what I am feeling right now. I am very sad.
Yesterday, when I got home, and immediately after letting Kira out to do her business, I saw (rather than heard) Wolfie struggling in the kitchen. He was crouched down, with his neck stretched out, and his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. He was desperately struggling to breathe. I grabbed the phone and called our vet’s office to say I was watching a cat suffocate before my eyes. “Bring him in.” Usually, he meows during the drive to and from the vet, but yesterday night he couldn’t get enough air to say anything. As soon as I got him in, they took him back and started him on oxygen, which eased his breathing somewhat.
Wolfie has had asthma for the past 8 or 9 years. They suggested steroids when it started, but my research on steroids made me VERY suspect. If steroids are bad for humans, why would they be any better for cats? They weaken the kidneys and are bad for the heart. He would have to be given a pill every morning and every evening, and he absolutely HATES pills. Daily is a dream when it comes to pills, but Wolfie (as sweet as he is), fights every inch of the way. Imagine forcing a pill down that cat’s throat every day for the past 8 years…
Well, the asthma caught up with him yesterday. The vet immediately started him on oxygen and gave him albuterol and steroids and antibiotics. They wanted to keep him for observation, so I went back to see him, and when I petted him he leaned back into my hand, and looked so much more comfortable with the oxygen, which the technician was holding up to his face. Then they called me at 9:00 p.m. and said he really needed to be watched during the night and could we take him to a 24-hour facility (about 20 miles away). We paid our $300 there and took him to the emergency clinic, where they immediately put him in an oxygen cage. The vet told us that the x-ray of his chest showed a collapsed lung, and that he has a heart murmur, as well as a secondary infection along with the asthma.
But this is what is so difficult for us right now: when we were kids, vets didn’t do all these heroics to save family pets. They just said: “well, it’s time to let him go.” But now, vets have their own form of “Hippocratic oath” and will try to do anything to save an animal, regardless of the long-range outcome. This vet was really good when it came to trying to save Wolfie. She said, keep him on oxygen for three days, let the antibiotics take effect on the secondary infection, let the steroids help get rid of the asthma, and see if he doesn’t come around. Sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? Can we inflate the collapsed lung, I ask. Well, no, it would be too dangerous. Then she adds that what actually looks like a collapsed lung may be pneumonia (which is not really as common in cats as you might think). Or, it may be blockage due to the asthma. Will he be able to come off of the oxygen in a couple of days? Well, we hope so. Will we be able to get rid of the asthma with the steroids? That is the plan and the hope. How much to leave him over night? $1500! (OMG) Three days? $4500 (Triple OMG). What happens after three days if he is not able to get off of the oxygen? We can reassess the options then.
Wow! Smack me in the face! OK, so, now we have a 15-year-old cat, with a collapsed lung, heart murmur, severe asthma, and an inability to breathe without oxygen. If we clear up the asthma, how long will do we think that will last? Unknown. So, in other words, I could come home someday and see him gasping like a fish again, or worse, find a poor little cat body with a horrific look on its face from suffocating to death. Do we leave him there, in the comfort of an oxygen cage for however long it takes, or do we take him home and try to administer an albuterol inhaler when he has trouble breathing? Well, no, you can’t take the albuterol home because it causes stress on the heart and he needs to be monitored.
In the end, we left him over night, at a negotiated much-reduced cost. This morning at 5:00, the vet tried to take him off of the oxygen for 30 minutes, and he went into breathing distress. H and I discussed the situation. Feeling like total and complete heels, we decided it was time to let him go. We phoned the emergency vet with our decision. But when H got to the emergency clinic (I simply could not accompany him, after my experience with Ziggy last March), they had Wolfie in the crate, ready to be brought home to face another day. I think they did not want to be the ones to put him to sleep…sending us a clear message of their displeasure with us, maybe? H called me when he got to the house and said Woofums was in terrible distress. Kira and Daily were very upset…they knew Wolfie was in bad shape. H said he understood what I had felt yesterday. It brought tears to his eyes. In fact, I have tears in mine right now with the memory. So he took Wolfie to our regular vet to do the sad final deed. He says that by the time he got there, Wolfie was laying on his side with his head (wet from Kira’s administrations) against the side of the carrier, struggling. The vet took one look at him and said he looked much worse than he had yesterday, before the oxygen. Personally, I think the oxygen may have helped him in the short run, but it created a dependency that made him worse in the long run.
We could have done what the emergency vet suggested: we could have spent a lot of money keeping him going in an oxygen cage for a week or so (ka-ching, ka-ching), in the hopes that we would clear up the infection, might clear up the asthma (not likely, considering that he has had it at least 8 years), perhaps address the heart murmur, maybe clear the collapsed lung (if it is pneumonia). And then who knows how long he would live after all that, my geriatric little cat?
This morning, when we were discussing all the “options,” I told H that I just could not make the decision, and would he please make it for me (you know what decision I was talking about, of course). He said “will you still love me after I do?” Heck, I think I love him even more for having done it and keeping me from having to say the obvious. I mean, I had already come to the conclusion that I wanted HIM to take responsibility for but could not bring myself to cast the deciding vote. What a wimp I am. H did it.
So, my sweet tomato-snatching Wolfgang Amadeus Sunwolf Lightfoot (named by my Elusive Offspring, and you will recognize my blog name) is gone now. At lunch, my friend Janet and I toasted our cats and their ability to give us years of great pleasure, ending with the sharp pain of loss. I enjoyed my 15 years of the Wolfman. I hope he’s breathing easy and chasing butterflies in that great kitty heaven above.
Yesterday, when I got home, and immediately after letting Kira out to do her business, I saw (rather than heard) Wolfie struggling in the kitchen. He was crouched down, with his neck stretched out, and his mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water. He was desperately struggling to breathe. I grabbed the phone and called our vet’s office to say I was watching a cat suffocate before my eyes. “Bring him in.” Usually, he meows during the drive to and from the vet, but yesterday night he couldn’t get enough air to say anything. As soon as I got him in, they took him back and started him on oxygen, which eased his breathing somewhat.
Wolfie has had asthma for the past 8 or 9 years. They suggested steroids when it started, but my research on steroids made me VERY suspect. If steroids are bad for humans, why would they be any better for cats? They weaken the kidneys and are bad for the heart. He would have to be given a pill every morning and every evening, and he absolutely HATES pills. Daily is a dream when it comes to pills, but Wolfie (as sweet as he is), fights every inch of the way. Imagine forcing a pill down that cat’s throat every day for the past 8 years…
Well, the asthma caught up with him yesterday. The vet immediately started him on oxygen and gave him albuterol and steroids and antibiotics. They wanted to keep him for observation, so I went back to see him, and when I petted him he leaned back into my hand, and looked so much more comfortable with the oxygen, which the technician was holding up to his face. Then they called me at 9:00 p.m. and said he really needed to be watched during the night and could we take him to a 24-hour facility (about 20 miles away). We paid our $300 there and took him to the emergency clinic, where they immediately put him in an oxygen cage. The vet told us that the x-ray of his chest showed a collapsed lung, and that he has a heart murmur, as well as a secondary infection along with the asthma.
But this is what is so difficult for us right now: when we were kids, vets didn’t do all these heroics to save family pets. They just said: “well, it’s time to let him go.” But now, vets have their own form of “Hippocratic oath” and will try to do anything to save an animal, regardless of the long-range outcome. This vet was really good when it came to trying to save Wolfie. She said, keep him on oxygen for three days, let the antibiotics take effect on the secondary infection, let the steroids help get rid of the asthma, and see if he doesn’t come around. Sounds reasonable, doesn’t it? Can we inflate the collapsed lung, I ask. Well, no, it would be too dangerous. Then she adds that what actually looks like a collapsed lung may be pneumonia (which is not really as common in cats as you might think). Or, it may be blockage due to the asthma. Will he be able to come off of the oxygen in a couple of days? Well, we hope so. Will we be able to get rid of the asthma with the steroids? That is the plan and the hope. How much to leave him over night? $1500! (OMG) Three days? $4500 (Triple OMG). What happens after three days if he is not able to get off of the oxygen? We can reassess the options then.
Wow! Smack me in the face! OK, so, now we have a 15-year-old cat, with a collapsed lung, heart murmur, severe asthma, and an inability to breathe without oxygen. If we clear up the asthma, how long will do we think that will last? Unknown. So, in other words, I could come home someday and see him gasping like a fish again, or worse, find a poor little cat body with a horrific look on its face from suffocating to death. Do we leave him there, in the comfort of an oxygen cage for however long it takes, or do we take him home and try to administer an albuterol inhaler when he has trouble breathing? Well, no, you can’t take the albuterol home because it causes stress on the heart and he needs to be monitored.
In the end, we left him over night, at a negotiated much-reduced cost. This morning at 5:00, the vet tried to take him off of the oxygen for 30 minutes, and he went into breathing distress. H and I discussed the situation. Feeling like total and complete heels, we decided it was time to let him go. We phoned the emergency vet with our decision. But when H got to the emergency clinic (I simply could not accompany him, after my experience with Ziggy last March), they had Wolfie in the crate, ready to be brought home to face another day. I think they did not want to be the ones to put him to sleep…sending us a clear message of their displeasure with us, maybe? H called me when he got to the house and said Woofums was in terrible distress. Kira and Daily were very upset…they knew Wolfie was in bad shape. H said he understood what I had felt yesterday. It brought tears to his eyes. In fact, I have tears in mine right now with the memory. So he took Wolfie to our regular vet to do the sad final deed. He says that by the time he got there, Wolfie was laying on his side with his head (wet from Kira’s administrations) against the side of the carrier, struggling. The vet took one look at him and said he looked much worse than he had yesterday, before the oxygen. Personally, I think the oxygen may have helped him in the short run, but it created a dependency that made him worse in the long run.
We could have done what the emergency vet suggested: we could have spent a lot of money keeping him going in an oxygen cage for a week or so (ka-ching, ka-ching), in the hopes that we would clear up the infection, might clear up the asthma (not likely, considering that he has had it at least 8 years), perhaps address the heart murmur, maybe clear the collapsed lung (if it is pneumonia). And then who knows how long he would live after all that, my geriatric little cat?
This morning, when we were discussing all the “options,” I told H that I just could not make the decision, and would he please make it for me (you know what decision I was talking about, of course). He said “will you still love me after I do?” Heck, I think I love him even more for having done it and keeping me from having to say the obvious. I mean, I had already come to the conclusion that I wanted HIM to take responsibility for but could not bring myself to cast the deciding vote. What a wimp I am. H did it.
So, my sweet tomato-snatching Wolfgang Amadeus Sunwolf Lightfoot (named by my Elusive Offspring, and you will recognize my blog name) is gone now. At lunch, my friend Janet and I toasted our cats and their ability to give us years of great pleasure, ending with the sharp pain of loss. I enjoyed my 15 years of the Wolfman. I hope he’s breathing easy and chasing butterflies in that great kitty heaven above.
Monday, March 23, 2009
Excellent Artsy Weekend
Last week was a rough one at work. On one of the days, I came in early to get ready for an early meeting, went to that meeting and went back to my office to start to send an e-mail to the team, while I was doing that someone called and I started an e-mail related to the call, while I was doing that someone came into my office and I started yet another e-mail...answered phone calls, went to discuss options with people in my cases. Those three e-mails, all started before 11:00 in the morning, did not get sent until around 1:30, at which time I was able to get lunch. The day was like that. Needless to say, I was SO ready for my weekend, and it did not disappoint.
Saturday, I went to the movie theater with my friend Janet to see the High Def showing of the Met's matinee performance of La Sonambula, a Bellini bel canto opera. I had never seen (or heard) it before, so it was a new experience for me. The music was beautiful, but the story was quite a bit more melodramatic than the usual opera. It did not turn me off, of course. I still enjoyed it immensely. Natalie Dessay and Juan Diego Florez played the leading roles, and they are both beautiful people with beautiful voices.
After the opera, Janet and I went to dinner and talked about music, books, poetry, stitching, art, trips to foreign lands, and had a very nice time. The opera started at 1:00 in the afternoon and we were finished with dinner by 6:00, so I got home early enough to tell my favorite husband there was still time to go out and get my copy of the Twilight DVD... hehehehe. Which we did. Good man. And then we settled in to watch it. We each got a beverage of choice -- H had Scotch, of course, and I had something called "blueberry tea" which my friend Mary taught me to make. There is no blueberry in this concoction. There is hot tea (I use chai tea) and a shot of amareto and a shot of Cointreau...and it's very yummy. And air popped popcorn. Lights out. OK, so it's a movie about teenage love, with vampires in it. When it was finished, H says to me: "Well, it was not as stupid as you led me to believe. It was actually rather good." Hah! I led him to believe it was stupid??? I don't THINK so! I don't think I ever said it was stupid. Maybe my elusive offspring told him that. Maybe he got the idea from listening to me and my friends acting sheepish about enjoying the books and the movie, um, multiple times. I mean, I did manage to see it four times in the theater, but that's because different friends needed someone to go with them, and I'm such an amenable friend. OK, so it was a good Saturday night.
Sunday, I had breakfast with my friend Nancy, while H played golf with Steve. Then I went with Janet to hear a wonderful piano recital by Olga Kern. She was amazing! She started the first half with a Haydn sonata and the Brahms variations on a theme from Paganini (lots of composers played with that theme...Rachmaninoff and Liszt included).
After he intermission, she was supposed to start with Chopin, but she said "There will be a slight change in the program. I think that no piano concert can be complete without Rachmaninoff so I will be playing the Second Sonata." Slight change??? Wow! I was so excited. I almost thought she had been listening to me during the intermission when I said to Janet that I was sorry that there was no Rachmaninoff on the agenda (my all time favorite composer, with Beethoven almost neck and neck). I was delighted with the change. Of course, I love Chopin, too, but given the choice, Rachmaninoff would always win for me. The audience did not seem disappointed either. Clearly, she loves Rachmaninoff, too. She played with such passion...I think there was one point where she was almost in tears herself. Cool! Then she ended with Liszt's Rhapsodie Espagnole (which also includes the Paganini theme). She did three encores...first, she played "Sparkle" (I think the composer may be Chen Yi), which I had never heard before. Then she played a Rachmaninoff piano/cello sonata with the president of the Washington Performing Arts Society (he appears to be a cellist, and a rather good one at that), and then she finished with another of my favorites, since I was a kid: the Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 (another Liszt). That was a real crowd pleaser...of course.
Very powerful and impressive. I'm not trying to be sexist when I say that I rarely hear women play with such strength...although our seats were on the wrong side of the piano and we could not see her hands as she played (and her fingers FLEW), I waited to see her hands. They are not long, elegant fingers. She has muscular hands and fingers and I would liken her hands to those of a farm girl more than a model. Very strong. Very controlled. I am always impressed by someone who can play Liszt...supposedly, each of his hands spanned twelve piano keys! I don't know if that's true, but I can barely get nine. Stupid short fingers. If you look at a photo of Liszt, you can see that he has very long fingers.
Back to Olga Kern. She's not only extremely talented (the first woman to win the Van Cliburn Competition in 30 years), but she is beautiful. She came onto the stage wearing a strapless form-fitting teal gown that flared like a flamenco dress below the knees. What a flat stomach! Arghhh. (OK I'm jealous of a woman who can play the piano like that, and LOOK so damned gorgeous at the same time). After the intermission, she surprised us by coming onto the stage in a golden ensemble, again very form fitting, with bits of ostrich feathers here and there on the long tight skirt. It was beautiful. Granted, I would have been impressed JUST to hear her...but I'm glad I got to see her, too.
OK, so I was obviously more impressed by the piano recital than the opera...but that happens. I have not been able to stop thinking about it.
We went out to dinner after the concert, and I got home somewhere between 8 and 8:30...at which point I immediately went back to reading "The Green Years" (the A.H. Cronin book my friend Tracy recommended). I had a hard time putting it down to go to sleep, and when I woke this morning at 6:00, I decided I just had to finish it before I went to work. Took me about 45 minutes. It was a good book. It put me in mind of Angela's Ashes, but I liked it so much better because the character was not completely down all the time. I don't expect to ever read Angela's Ashes again, but I could see myself reading The Green Years again some day. But first, I have SO many other books on my reading list.
I'm in the mood for Liszt...I think I will play "Totentanz." On the iPod, silly, not on the piano. Sigh...
Saturday, I went to the movie theater with my friend Janet to see the High Def showing of the Met's matinee performance of La Sonambula, a Bellini bel canto opera. I had never seen (or heard) it before, so it was a new experience for me. The music was beautiful, but the story was quite a bit more melodramatic than the usual opera. It did not turn me off, of course. I still enjoyed it immensely. Natalie Dessay and Juan Diego Florez played the leading roles, and they are both beautiful people with beautiful voices.
After the opera, Janet and I went to dinner and talked about music, books, poetry, stitching, art, trips to foreign lands, and had a very nice time. The opera started at 1:00 in the afternoon and we were finished with dinner by 6:00, so I got home early enough to tell my favorite husband there was still time to go out and get my copy of the Twilight DVD... hehehehe. Which we did. Good man. And then we settled in to watch it. We each got a beverage of choice -- H had Scotch, of course, and I had something called "blueberry tea" which my friend Mary taught me to make. There is no blueberry in this concoction. There is hot tea (I use chai tea) and a shot of amareto and a shot of Cointreau...and it's very yummy. And air popped popcorn. Lights out. OK, so it's a movie about teenage love, with vampires in it. When it was finished, H says to me: "Well, it was not as stupid as you led me to believe. It was actually rather good." Hah! I led him to believe it was stupid??? I don't THINK so! I don't think I ever said it was stupid. Maybe my elusive offspring told him that. Maybe he got the idea from listening to me and my friends acting sheepish about enjoying the books and the movie, um, multiple times. I mean, I did manage to see it four times in the theater, but that's because different friends needed someone to go with them, and I'm such an amenable friend. OK, so it was a good Saturday night.
Sunday, I had breakfast with my friend Nancy, while H played golf with Steve. Then I went with Janet to hear a wonderful piano recital by Olga Kern. She was amazing! She started the first half with a Haydn sonata and the Brahms variations on a theme from Paganini (lots of composers played with that theme...Rachmaninoff and Liszt included).
After he intermission, she was supposed to start with Chopin, but she said "There will be a slight change in the program. I think that no piano concert can be complete without Rachmaninoff so I will be playing the Second Sonata." Slight change??? Wow! I was so excited. I almost thought she had been listening to me during the intermission when I said to Janet that I was sorry that there was no Rachmaninoff on the agenda (my all time favorite composer, with Beethoven almost neck and neck). I was delighted with the change. Of course, I love Chopin, too, but given the choice, Rachmaninoff would always win for me. The audience did not seem disappointed either. Clearly, she loves Rachmaninoff, too. She played with such passion...I think there was one point where she was almost in tears herself. Cool! Then she ended with Liszt's Rhapsodie Espagnole (which also includes the Paganini theme). She did three encores...first, she played "Sparkle" (I think the composer may be Chen Yi), which I had never heard before. Then she played a Rachmaninoff piano/cello sonata with the president of the Washington Performing Arts Society (he appears to be a cellist, and a rather good one at that), and then she finished with another of my favorites, since I was a kid: the Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 (another Liszt). That was a real crowd pleaser...of course.
Very powerful and impressive. I'm not trying to be sexist when I say that I rarely hear women play with such strength...although our seats were on the wrong side of the piano and we could not see her hands as she played (and her fingers FLEW), I waited to see her hands. They are not long, elegant fingers. She has muscular hands and fingers and I would liken her hands to those of a farm girl more than a model. Very strong. Very controlled. I am always impressed by someone who can play Liszt...supposedly, each of his hands spanned twelve piano keys! I don't know if that's true, but I can barely get nine. Stupid short fingers. If you look at a photo of Liszt, you can see that he has very long fingers.
Back to Olga Kern. She's not only extremely talented (the first woman to win the Van Cliburn Competition in 30 years), but she is beautiful. She came onto the stage wearing a strapless form-fitting teal gown that flared like a flamenco dress below the knees. What a flat stomach! Arghhh. (OK I'm jealous of a woman who can play the piano like that, and LOOK so damned gorgeous at the same time). After the intermission, she surprised us by coming onto the stage in a golden ensemble, again very form fitting, with bits of ostrich feathers here and there on the long tight skirt. It was beautiful. Granted, I would have been impressed JUST to hear her...but I'm glad I got to see her, too.
OK, so I was obviously more impressed by the piano recital than the opera...but that happens. I have not been able to stop thinking about it.
We went out to dinner after the concert, and I got home somewhere between 8 and 8:30...at which point I immediately went back to reading "The Green Years" (the A.H. Cronin book my friend Tracy recommended). I had a hard time putting it down to go to sleep, and when I woke this morning at 6:00, I decided I just had to finish it before I went to work. Took me about 45 minutes. It was a good book. It put me in mind of Angela's Ashes, but I liked it so much better because the character was not completely down all the time. I don't expect to ever read Angela's Ashes again, but I could see myself reading The Green Years again some day. But first, I have SO many other books on my reading list.
I'm in the mood for Liszt...I think I will play "Totentanz." On the iPod, silly, not on the piano. Sigh...
Monday, March 16, 2009
Working and Playing
I have been really working hard at the office lately. It's very stressful, and yet satisfying. That seems strange to me, a sort of dichotomy. I have a settlement/technical conference tomorrow, so I decided to get in VERY early this morning so I could go through documents and filings to be really prepared, and I think I am. We'll see how it goes tomorrow. I'd really like to achieve a settlement in this case. It's been a difficult one, with aggressive personalities and clashing ideas. Still, it really should settle.
But, in addition to working full days (and some evenings and weekends as well), I have managed to fit in a lot of reading, stitching, piano playing and socializing. I can't believe how many books I have read since I got my pony (Kindle). On the Kindle, I read all three "Dexter" books (about the serial killer who only kills serial killers). I liked the first book, felt lukewarm about the second, and really didn't care for the third. On the other hand, I absolutely love the television series (on Showtime). I also finished three more Alexander Kent (Bolitho) novels, and a book called "Beat the Reaper" by Josh Bazell. That last book was all right. I think it had a lot more potential than it actually realized (this one was a book about a mob hitman who became a doctor to try to hide from his past, unsuccessfully, I might add). I will admit that it was very humorous, with a clever turn of phrase. After all that blood and gore, I decided I needed something a lot more gentle. So I read Anne of Green Gables, and I am currently reading Anne of Avonlea. All that on the Kindle. But of course, the Kindle has not taken me away from the beloved paper books. I read a couple of Alexander Kent novels and Life With Father (Clarence Day), which I've read a couple of times and absolutely love. It's worth reading many times over. I am currently reading a very good book by A.H. Cronin, called The Green Years, recommended by my best friend Tracy. The interesting thing is that I now find myself reading two books at the same time...one on the Kindle and one in paper. It is wonderful to escape into another world.
I've also been stitching some nice needlepoint pieces. I will photograph some and post them soon. I usually stitch in the evening, while watching television...Chuck or CSI or some such. Which is interesting. Although I'm focusing on the stitching, I nevertheless enjoy the show. If a few weeks later a show is repeated, I usually find myself thinking, oh, I haven't seen this one yet...that's because I probably haven't seen it...I listened to it while stitching. So it's a new experience for me to actually watch it.
Then, last week, I sat down at the piano and started playing again. I was inspired by Blue Keys to start playing. I have not played in years and, wow, my poor fingers know it! Once upon a time, I was very good. But now, I find myself stumbling around over the keyboard, hitting the wrong keys, timing off, fingering off. And forget theory! Still, I am enjoying my little bit of time at the piano. Right now, I am re-learning Handel's Sarabande...it's so dramatic for a baroque piece. I need to get the piano tuned soon.
All this and my project room, too. My back is really sore from moving boxes and reorganizing...
So, my life is very rich right now. But please excuse me while I return to The Green Years for a half an hour before going to bed.
But, in addition to working full days (and some evenings and weekends as well), I have managed to fit in a lot of reading, stitching, piano playing and socializing. I can't believe how many books I have read since I got my pony (Kindle). On the Kindle, I read all three "Dexter" books (about the serial killer who only kills serial killers). I liked the first book, felt lukewarm about the second, and really didn't care for the third. On the other hand, I absolutely love the television series (on Showtime). I also finished three more Alexander Kent (Bolitho) novels, and a book called "Beat the Reaper" by Josh Bazell. That last book was all right. I think it had a lot more potential than it actually realized (this one was a book about a mob hitman who became a doctor to try to hide from his past, unsuccessfully, I might add). I will admit that it was very humorous, with a clever turn of phrase. After all that blood and gore, I decided I needed something a lot more gentle. So I read Anne of Green Gables, and I am currently reading Anne of Avonlea. All that on the Kindle. But of course, the Kindle has not taken me away from the beloved paper books. I read a couple of Alexander Kent novels and Life With Father (Clarence Day), which I've read a couple of times and absolutely love. It's worth reading many times over. I am currently reading a very good book by A.H. Cronin, called The Green Years, recommended by my best friend Tracy. The interesting thing is that I now find myself reading two books at the same time...one on the Kindle and one in paper. It is wonderful to escape into another world.
I've also been stitching some nice needlepoint pieces. I will photograph some and post them soon. I usually stitch in the evening, while watching television...Chuck or CSI or some such. Which is interesting. Although I'm focusing on the stitching, I nevertheless enjoy the show. If a few weeks later a show is repeated, I usually find myself thinking, oh, I haven't seen this one yet...that's because I probably haven't seen it...I listened to it while stitching. So it's a new experience for me to actually watch it.
Then, last week, I sat down at the piano and started playing again. I was inspired by Blue Keys to start playing. I have not played in years and, wow, my poor fingers know it! Once upon a time, I was very good. But now, I find myself stumbling around over the keyboard, hitting the wrong keys, timing off, fingering off. And forget theory! Still, I am enjoying my little bit of time at the piano. Right now, I am re-learning Handel's Sarabande...it's so dramatic for a baroque piece. I need to get the piano tuned soon.
All this and my project room, too. My back is really sore from moving boxes and reorganizing...
So, my life is very rich right now. But please excuse me while I return to The Green Years for a half an hour before going to bed.
Sunday, March 8, 2009
My Interview with RunningMyMassOff
About a month ago, RunningMyMassOff sent me some questions to "interview me" and finally I am posting my answers. Being interviewed like this is very interesting. If you'd like me to interview you, just ask, and I'll think up some questions for you. Then you can post the questions and answers on your blog...in the meantime, here are RMMO's questions and my answers.
1. What has been the biggest challenge/obstacle in your life and what did you do to overcome it?
The biggest challenge…probably deciding what I want to be when I grow up… this is an ongoing problem. I really love what I do. I am probably exactly where I should be…a government litigator. I worked for two different large law firms and ultimately left. I did not like their politics of doing business. The interesting billing schemes (and yes, I mean schemes). The egos. The sleaze factor. The social deviates (my favorite husband’s term). Although I took a giant pay cut to return to the government, I knew I really was going where I belonged…as a public interest lawyer. I like winning cases, but I really feel successful when my cases settle, without the need for costly litigation. After all is said and done, though, I think I would love to retire early (or to be more realistic I should say retire late, now that the economy has tanked so badly, and my investments with it) and spend my time in creative endeavors, especially painting little watercolors (I like miniatures). And designing needlework. And art jewelry. Creative stuff.
2. What has been the favorite performance you've seen (opera, symphony, musical, play, etc.) and why did it make such an impact on you?
I would have to say that my favorite performance (and this is going to sound corny) would be any performance by my son, whether singing or acting, and although he was really good in so many plays, my all time favorite is the time he played/sang the part of the Major General in his high school’s production of Gilbert & Sullivan’s “Pirates of Penzance.” I know I’m his mom and I’m biased, but he really was probably the handsomest Major General in the history of the musical…I mean, the Major General is supposed to be an old grey-bearded guy, but not this time. The elusive one was quite striking with his curly ginger hair and deep sideburns, and what a lovely voice. I absolutely love to hear him sing. Of course, I enjoy other performances, too…plays, operas, musicals, movies…I like entertainment. And I like to be entertained. Today, I went with my friend Janet to see a simulcast of the Met's production of "Madama Butterfly" and it was absolutely beautiful. I love Puccini. I think I have probably said that before...
3. If you were to select a novel/series in which you could be a character (either an existing character or a new one), what novel/series would it be and why?
It would definitely have to be a Jane Austen book, and probably Emma or Elizabeth Bennett. Emma had a lively mind, and was terribly bored, I think, and therefore spent her time trying to play matchmaker. Because she succeeded at it one time, she was sure she could match anyone anywhere, and almost messed up her own future. Elizabeth Bennett was a great character because she was so feisty, and at the same time very self-possessed. Of course, I would want to be a character with lots of money, because if I had to live back then, I really wouldn't want to spend my time on the day-to-day necessities of life. On the other hand, I would not want to live then. Without the internet? Without cellphones (or any phones for that matter). Without cars and airplanes? Or even bicycles at that point! Without CDs or iPods??? Or radios or television (see, I really do like to be entertained). No electricity. No air conditioning! Yikes, I think I will stay right here and now…
4. What do you miss most about living in Texas?
I miss my family very much. The warm weather. The slower, more relaxed atmosphere (living in the DC area can be rough), but I have to admit that to me it feels even more relaxed in LA! The ability to get out and do stuff. Horses and western riding. Houston. The proud Texas history. Yet, even as I say that, I believe that I am no longer a Texan. I have been away so long that I don’t think I would be comfortable living in Texas any more. I love living here now. I have Potomac fever and it’s never gone away.
5. If you could choose any dream vacation (money not an issue), where would you go, who would you take with you, and what would you do?
This is a difficult one. If money were no object, my dream vacation would be to take several months and visit lots of countries, starting with Scotland, England and Ireland, then France and Germany and Spain and Italy. I would love to take a cruise of the fiords in Norway. I'd bring my little paint set with me everywhere, and my wonderful digital camera. There were no digital cameras in Jane Austen's time.
So, those are my answers to the interview. Remember, if you want to be interviewed, let me know, and I'll come up with some questions. It may take me a little while, but be patient.
1. What has been the biggest challenge/obstacle in your life and what did you do to overcome it?
The biggest challenge…probably deciding what I want to be when I grow up… this is an ongoing problem. I really love what I do. I am probably exactly where I should be…a government litigator. I worked for two different large law firms and ultimately left. I did not like their politics of doing business. The interesting billing schemes (and yes, I mean schemes). The egos. The sleaze factor. The social deviates (my favorite husband’s term). Although I took a giant pay cut to return to the government, I knew I really was going where I belonged…as a public interest lawyer. I like winning cases, but I really feel successful when my cases settle, without the need for costly litigation. After all is said and done, though, I think I would love to retire early (or to be more realistic I should say retire late, now that the economy has tanked so badly, and my investments with it) and spend my time in creative endeavors, especially painting little watercolors (I like miniatures). And designing needlework. And art jewelry. Creative stuff.
2. What has been the favorite performance you've seen (opera, symphony, musical, play, etc.) and why did it make such an impact on you?
I would have to say that my favorite performance (and this is going to sound corny) would be any performance by my son, whether singing or acting, and although he was really good in so many plays, my all time favorite is the time he played/sang the part of the Major General in his high school’s production of Gilbert & Sullivan’s “Pirates of Penzance.” I know I’m his mom and I’m biased, but he really was probably the handsomest Major General in the history of the musical…I mean, the Major General is supposed to be an old grey-bearded guy, but not this time. The elusive one was quite striking with his curly ginger hair and deep sideburns, and what a lovely voice. I absolutely love to hear him sing. Of course, I enjoy other performances, too…plays, operas, musicals, movies…I like entertainment. And I like to be entertained. Today, I went with my friend Janet to see a simulcast of the Met's production of "Madama Butterfly" and it was absolutely beautiful. I love Puccini. I think I have probably said that before...
3. If you were to select a novel/series in which you could be a character (either an existing character or a new one), what novel/series would it be and why?
It would definitely have to be a Jane Austen book, and probably Emma or Elizabeth Bennett. Emma had a lively mind, and was terribly bored, I think, and therefore spent her time trying to play matchmaker. Because she succeeded at it one time, she was sure she could match anyone anywhere, and almost messed up her own future. Elizabeth Bennett was a great character because she was so feisty, and at the same time very self-possessed. Of course, I would want to be a character with lots of money, because if I had to live back then, I really wouldn't want to spend my time on the day-to-day necessities of life. On the other hand, I would not want to live then. Without the internet? Without cellphones (or any phones for that matter). Without cars and airplanes? Or even bicycles at that point! Without CDs or iPods??? Or radios or television (see, I really do like to be entertained). No electricity. No air conditioning! Yikes, I think I will stay right here and now…
4. What do you miss most about living in Texas?
I miss my family very much. The warm weather. The slower, more relaxed atmosphere (living in the DC area can be rough), but I have to admit that to me it feels even more relaxed in LA! The ability to get out and do stuff. Horses and western riding. Houston. The proud Texas history. Yet, even as I say that, I believe that I am no longer a Texan. I have been away so long that I don’t think I would be comfortable living in Texas any more. I love living here now. I have Potomac fever and it’s never gone away.
5. If you could choose any dream vacation (money not an issue), where would you go, who would you take with you, and what would you do?
This is a difficult one. If money were no object, my dream vacation would be to take several months and visit lots of countries, starting with Scotland, England and Ireland, then France and Germany and Spain and Italy. I would love to take a cruise of the fiords in Norway. I'd bring my little paint set with me everywhere, and my wonderful digital camera. There were no digital cameras in Jane Austen's time.
So, those are my answers to the interview. Remember, if you want to be interviewed, let me know, and I'll come up with some questions. It may take me a little while, but be patient.
Tuesday, March 3, 2009
Operation: Project Room/Guest Room
I know it's been a long time since I have written. The week after Valentine's Day, I got very sick with some sort of sinus infection/flu/cold thingy and completely LOST four and a half entire days. I mean LOST those days entirely, and the infection/whatever actually lasted about a week, making it hard to accomplish anything. Then I got very involved in trying to reclaim the "project room/guest room" from the disaster it had become. For some time now I have called it the "explosion room." It's the place I would throw stuff to get it out of the way when people came over for a visit, or when the cleaning lady came (I always told her to ignore that room), or any other number of things would cause me to make a mess of that room. And when my sister (Girl from Texas) came for Christmas, I stuck her in that room...how awful of me! She, nice person that she is, never complained. But now things will be different! She will have a very nice accommodation.
Last Thursday, my favorite husband took me to Ikea, where we found two wonderful white bookshelves, with glass doors, both six feet tall and so roomy. All of my projects have been organized neatly in those bookshelves. We are talking about a lot of different kinds of project, from memory books to painting to beading to knitting to needlepointing and sewing, and any number of fun creative activities to entertain an active mind. I still have about a dozen boxes of papers and stuff to go through, and that will happen slowly over time, but I filled three boxes and two bags with stuff for Good Will, shredded some paperwork (but not enough), organized projects that can be finished quickly, and cleaned my desk, which makes me want to spend more time in this room!
Today, Sara, my cleaning lady, came. I love my cleaning lady. I told her today that I love to see her because she always makes me feel so good about my space. I think she should get a cleaning lady for HER house. Then she will know just how happy she makes people. She is one of the sweetest people I have ever met. I'm waxing poetic...you'd think I'd overdosed on caffeine the way I am going on right now, but it is simply that I am in a good mood because the house is really coming together. For the first time in at least eight years (since we started renovating this old house of ours).
The next post will be my answers to an interview I got from "Running My Mass Off" a few weeks ago. I started answering the questions, but have not finished yet. Stay tuned. This interviewing thing is fun.
Gotta go. Must start going through some more boxes...and finishing some of these pending projects.
Last Thursday, my favorite husband took me to Ikea, where we found two wonderful white bookshelves, with glass doors, both six feet tall and so roomy. All of my projects have been organized neatly in those bookshelves. We are talking about a lot of different kinds of project, from memory books to painting to beading to knitting to needlepointing and sewing, and any number of fun creative activities to entertain an active mind. I still have about a dozen boxes of papers and stuff to go through, and that will happen slowly over time, but I filled three boxes and two bags with stuff for Good Will, shredded some paperwork (but not enough), organized projects that can be finished quickly, and cleaned my desk, which makes me want to spend more time in this room!
Today, Sara, my cleaning lady, came. I love my cleaning lady. I told her today that I love to see her because she always makes me feel so good about my space. I think she should get a cleaning lady for HER house. Then she will know just how happy she makes people. She is one of the sweetest people I have ever met. I'm waxing poetic...you'd think I'd overdosed on caffeine the way I am going on right now, but it is simply that I am in a good mood because the house is really coming together. For the first time in at least eight years (since we started renovating this old house of ours).
The next post will be my answers to an interview I got from "Running My Mass Off" a few weeks ago. I started answering the questions, but have not finished yet. Stay tuned. This interviewing thing is fun.
Gotta go. Must start going through some more boxes...and finishing some of these pending projects.
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